I love making lists, it’s the over accomplisher, slightly OCD side of me. I make lists for groceries, to-do’s and fun stuff. I have a list of goals too! And it’s January so let’s talk about goals. Rather let’s talk about ONE goal.
Over 80% of individuals make resolutions every year, that they quit on by the end of January. Why? Resolutions are made to be quit on, compared to goals that are made to be achieved. I invite you to trash your list of resolutions immediately, if you’ve made one. Resolutions come out of frustrations, social pressures and guilt from over indulging during the holidays, that’s why they don’t stick. Your ego comes up with resolutions, your authentic self comes up with the goals.
Goals are dreams with a game plan attached, which makes them more likely to come to fruition. Goals also have a true intention.
For example, a lot of individuals will plan on losing weight gained thanks to Mr Cookie and Lady Champagne. Do we want to lose weight to be healthier? To please our mate? To fit the social standards? The intention will define the outcome. Making a decision based on what other people will think will likely bring resentment and frustration. Setting a goal based on our core belief will fuel us to meet, if not surpass, that goal.
We don’t always meet our goals, we need to tweak the game plan, and that’s alright. That’s part of the process of getting better at whatever we learn to do. Be kind to yourself, be patient. All successful individual have one thing in common: they don’t quit, when it gets hard.
I invite you to:
-Set ONE goal that resonates with your true self
-Make a game plan, measurable, achievable, rewarding
-Reevaluate and tweak as needed
-Treat yourself when you reach your goal (very important)
By setting one goal at a time, you’re more likely to stay focused and make better use of your energy and headspace.
Change is hard, it is achievable with the proper method and intention though. You can do it!
Reach for the greatest version of yourself!
First of all, I don’t believe in luck! I’ve been known to say, and often, “there is no such thing as luck!”. I said it once to a high level executive, in front of the store managers during a corporate visit, which stopped everybody on their tracks. It’s good to give individuals something to reflect on, right? And reflection took place, as my favorite manager at the time came to me later that day, and said: “It works both ways!” to which I wholeheartedly agree. I had taken credit for my success that day, and I was ready to take credit for my failures just the same.
I’m really stimulated by people that own their stuff! We live in a blaming culture. we blame the government, the weather, traffic, our coworkers….you get the idea. That being said, we’re very quick at taking credit when we feel we contributed to a successful outcome. In my opinion, as my then manager stated it, it works both ways. you’ll get what you put in.
Is the government acting in a way that doesn’t resonate with you? Did you vote? did you tell your friends to vote?
Is the weather bothering you? You can work with it or against it, the weather is out of your control, how you relate to it is all about you.
Too much traffic? Have you considered a different route or reorganizing your schedule?
Are your colleagues driving you up the wall? There is only so much you can do about how they want to act, however, we always have room to empathize and relate to others.
If any of those comments triggers you to an answer along the lines of: “she doesn’t understand, she doesn’t get it, I have so much to do and there is no other way to do it,..”
I hear you, I’ve been there, there is a way! You can take my word for it or ignore it. That being said, I do wish for more individuals to appreciate that they are the creators of their reality, that they are so powerful and capable. The more we focus on being the victim, the less we have energy to be the creator. I invite you to be a creator as I believe you already are one. Just do it!
So there is no such thing as luck in my opinion. Although I did use that word this morning with a friend and she caught it. She agrees with my perspective of creation. So I paused and I reflected. I felt lucky at that moment in the conversation relating to the fantastic things happening in my life right now. I felt lucky in a grateful way, in a blessed way. I felt lucky to be part of a system, world, planet, community, however we want to call it. Because when you’re part of something bigger than yourself, you want to create more than you may think you’re capable of. And you may find yourself, blessed, happy, voire lucky.
I invite you to create today, and feel grateful for your powers!
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There is one ongoing thought present with me, pretty much at all time: “How can I do better?” I’m driven, to a fault, to reach excellence. I’m hungry for growth and knowledge, always have been. In my businesses, consulting and dancing, as well as in my private life, I’m always looking at the next level or how I can improve on the present version. It’s a talent and a strong desire, which equips me to help individuals to reach the next level of their life, or a more productive version of it.
I’m also a problem solver, a fixer, aka a-pain-in-the-neck, when that talent is not solicited. All that knowledge accumulated to make things better can work against me when the present version is actually perfect. We don’t want to improve on perfection, there is no need for it. No need either to fix what’s not broken.
So what to improve? And when?
It boils down to a very interesting emotional dance, pun intended, with oneself. That’s when it’s vital to shut down the outside, and inside noise, to really listen to our inner self. What are the emotions at play? Can you name them? The heart never lies. If a situation is welcoming, your heart will tell you. Let’s keep in mind that appearances can be deceiving. A seemingly perfect experience may send your heart for a disturbing spin. On the other hand, a less than extraordinary experience may have your heart at peace. Why is that?
Your heart is the absolute indicator of what needs to be fixed, improved, changed. Or not! Appearances can be confusing and deceptive but your heart never lies. How many times have you had a conversation with a friend stating that they had the perfect job, relationship, vacation planned, but there was no glimmer in their eyes… We’ve all had that conversation, on each side of that table. There is what perfection looks like, and what perfection feels like. I encourage you to focus on the feeling. We live in a culture that is so focused on appearances and what success and happiness is supposed to look like. At the same time, each one of us is absolutely unique. The cultural standards do not possibly fit everybody’s heart’s desires, it simply doesn’t work!
So I invite you to embrace mediocrity in any area of your life because it takes courage to face a situation that is less than ideal. Once you know the area that can use improvement you will start moving in a productive direction. Most importantly, in a direction that is authentic and leads to true happiness.
As always, I’m here to help!